be, and put me upon making Poems, on pur pofe that he might alter them, Fr. I once thought I could never have discharged my Debt to his Kindness, but have lately been informed, to my unspeakable Comfort, that I have more than paid it all. For Monfieur de Montagne has affured me, "that the Perfon who "receives a Benefit obliges the Giver:" for fince the chief Endeavour of one Friend is to do good to the other, he, who adminifters both the Matter and Occafion, is the Man who is liberal. At this Rate it is impoffible Dr. Swift fhould be ever out of my Debt, as Matters ftand already: and, for the future, he may expect daily more Obligations from his most faithful, affectionate, THE ealy Manner, in which you reproach me for not acquainting you with the poor Dean's Situation, lays a fresh Obligation upon me; yet mean as an Excufe is for a Fault, I fhall attempt one to your Lordship, and only for this Reason, that you may not think me capable of neglecting any thing you could command me. I told you in my laft Letter, the Dean's Underftanding was quite gone, and I feared the farther N 2 Parti Particulars would only fhock the Tenderness of your Nature, and the melancholy Scene make your Heart ach, as it has often done mine. I was the last Person whom he knew, and when that part of his Memory failed, he was so outragious at seeing any body, that I was forced to leave him, nor could he reft for a Night or two after seeing any Perfon: fo that all the Attendance which I could pay him was calling twice a Week to inquire after his Health, and to obferve that proper Care was taken of him, and durft only look at him while his Back was towards me, fearing to difcompofe him. He walked ten Hours a Day, would not eat or drink if his Servant stayed in the Room. His Meat was ferved up ready cut, and sometimes it would lie an Hour on the Table before he would touch it, and then eat it walking. About fix Weeks ago, in one Night's time, his left Eye fwelled as large as an Egg, and the Lid Mr. Nichols (his Surgeon) thought would mortify, and many large Boils appeared upon his Arms and Body. The Torture he was in is not to be described. Perfons could fcarce hold him for a Week from tearing out his own Eyes: and, for near a Month, he did not fleep two Hours in twenty four yet a moderate Appetite continued; and what is more to be wondered at, the last Day of his Illness he knew me perfectly well, took me by the Hand, called me by my Name, and fhewed the fame Pleasure as ufual in feeing me. I afked him if he would give me a Dinner? He faid to be fure, my old Friend. Thus he conrinued that Day, and knew the Doctor and Surgeon, and all his Family fo well, that Mr. Nichols thought it poffible he might return to a Five Share Share of Understanding, fo as to be able to call for what he wanted, and to bear fome of his old Friends to amufe him. But alas! this Pleasure to me was but of fhort Duration; for the next Day or two it was all, over, and proved to be only Pain that had rouzed him. He is now free from Torture his Eye almost well; very quiet, and begins to fleep, but cannot, without great Difficulty, be prevailed on to walk a turn about his Room and yet in this way the Physicians think he may hold out for fome time. I an my Lord, Your Lordship's most obedient AS S to the Story of O poor old Man! I inquired into it. The Dean did fay fomething upon his feeing himself in the Glafs, but neither Mrs. Ridgeway, nor the lower Servants could tell me what it was he faid. I defired them to recollect it, by the time when I fhould come again to the Deanery. I have been there fince, they cannot recollect it. A thousand Stories have been invented of him within these two Years, and imposed upon the World. I thought this might have been one of them; and yet I am now inclined to think there may be fome Truth in it: for on Sunday the 17th of March, as he fat in N 3 his his Chair, upon the Housekeeper's moving a Knife from him as he was going to catch at it, he fhrugged his Shoulders, and, rocking himfelf, and faid, I am what I am, I am what I am: and about fix Minutes afterwards, repeated the fame Words two or three times over. His Servant fhaves his Cheeks, and all his Face as low as the Tip of his Chin, once a Week: but under the Chin, and about the Throat, when the Hair grows long, it is cut with Sciffars. Sometimes he will not utter a Syllable: at other times he will fpeak incoherent Words: but he never yet, as far as I could hear, talked nonsense, or faid a foolish thing. About four Months ago he gave me great 'Trouble: he seemed to have a mind to talk to me. In order to try what he would fay, I told him, I came to dine with him, and immediately his Housekeeper, Mrs. Ridgeway, faid, Won't you give Mr. Swift a Glass of Wine, Sir? He shrugged his Shoulders, juft as he used to do when he had a mind that a Friend fhould fpend the Evening with him. Shrugging his Shoulders, your Lordfhip may remember, was as much as to fay, "You will ruin me in Wine." I own, I was fcarce able to bear the Sight. Soon after, he again endeavoured, with a good deal of Pain, to find Words to fpeak to me: at laft, not being able, after many Efforts, he gave a heavy Sigh, and, I think, was afterwards filent. This puts me in mind of what he faid about five Days ago. He endeavoured feveral times to fpeak to his Servant (now and then he calls him by his Name) at laft, not finding Words to exprefs what he would be at, after fome Uneafinefs, he faid, "I am a Fool." Not long ago, the Servant took up his Watch that lay upon the Table to see what o' Clock it was, he faid, "Bring it "here" and when it was brought, he looked very attentively at it: fome time ago, the Servant was breaking a large ftubborn Coal, he faid, "That is a ftone, you Blockhead." In a few Days, or fome very fhort Time, after Guardians had been appointed for him, I went into his dining Room, where he was walking; I faid fomething to him very infignificant, I know not what; but inftead of making any kind of answer to it, he faid, " Go, go," pointing with his Hand to the Door, and immediately afterwards, raifing his Hand to his Head, he faid, "My best Understanding," and fo broke off abruptly, and walked away, I am, my Lord, Your Lordship's most obedient, and most humble Servaut, Dub. April 4, 1744 DEANE SWIFT. FINI S.. |