THE ECONOMIST.

BY THE SAME.

LAURA, profuse as city dame can be,
Still piques herself on her œconomy:

She ne'er will buy a thing that's dear, the vows,
Yet, by her bargains, pillages her spouse.

"That set of china was the cheapest thing!—
"Tis fine enough to entertain the king.
"This cambric, flily flipp'd into her hand,

"Was fuch a bargain-she could not withstand!
"That cloth, tho' dear, coft nothing, one may say ;-
" "Twill wear for ever, and I know 'twill pay."
Then she has bought the finest goose in town;
They afk'd three fhillings-but took half-a-crown.
"And don't you think this ham prodigious cheap?
"We did not want it but, you know, 'twill keep."
Her friends with bargains thus poor Laura treats,
Laughs at her tradesmen, whilst herself she cheats;
But, Laura, ftop in time; too late, I fear,

You'll find thefe bargains coft you dev'lish dear.

ΤΟ

ESQ ANTIQUARY, AND F.R.S

BY THE SAME.

GIVE me the thing that's pretty, odd, and new; All ugly, old, odd things-I leave to you.

DIOGENES TO ARISTIPPUS.

BY THE SAME.

CLOY'D with ragouts, you scorn my fimple food;
And think good eating is man's only good:

I ask no more than Temperance can give;
You live to eat, I only eat-to live.

ON THE DEATH OF AN EPICURE.

BY THE SAME.

AT length, my friends, the feaft of life is o'er;
I've eat fufficient, I can drink no more:

My night is come; I've spent a jovial day;

'Tis time to part; but, oh!—what is to pay?

ON ERECTING A MONUMENT TO SHAKSPEARE, UNDER THE DIRECTION OF MR. POPE, LORD BURLINGTON, &c.

BY THE SAME,

TO mark her Shakspeare's worth, and Britain's love,
Let Pope defign, and Burlington approve :
Superfluous care! when distant times shall view
This tomb grown old-his works fhall ftill be new.

ON A BAD SINGER. FROM LUCILIUS.

BY THE SAME.

WHEN fcreech-owls fcream, their note portends To frighted mortals, death of friends;

But when Corvino ftrains his throat,

E'en fcreech-owls ficken at the note.

ON A PILFERING QUACK.

AN EPIGRAM FROM THE GREEK.

BY THE SAME..

CELSUS takes off, by dint of fkill,

Each bodily difafter;

But takes off fpoons, without a pill,

Your plate, without a plaster.

THE RIVAL BEAUTIES. FROM RUFINUS.

BY THE SAME.

THREE lovely nymphs, contending for the prize,
Display'd their charms before my critic eyes:
Superior beauties heighten'd every grace,

And feem'd to mark them of celeftial race:
But I, who, blefs'd like Paris, fear'd his fall,
Swore each a Venus was,-and pleas'd them all.

THE MISER'S VAULTS.

BY THE SAME.

Servata centum clavibus. HOR.

THY cellars, friend, may juftly vaults be ftyl'd,
Where casks on casks, on bottles bottles pil'd,
By locks and bolts fo closely are confin'd,
Thy liquor's dead-and buried to mankind.

ON AN OLD GENTLEMAN'S MARRYING A

FINE SINGING GIRL.

BY THE SAME.

FAM'D for the mufic of her ftrains,

A warbling Linnet, o'er the plains,

And through the neighbouring groves, was known; The Squire, as late he trudg'd along,

Was ravish'd with this Linnet's fong,

And wifh'd to make the bird his own.

With curious art the fnare was fet,

He caught her in his filken net

(Ye fwains, the public lofs deplore!) She flutters round her gilded cage; Looks pretty; but, I dare engage,

Will charm him with her fongs no more.

THE SAD ALTERNATIVE.

BY THE SAME.

IN heat of youth, poor Jack engag'd a wife,

Whofe tongue, he found, might prove a scourge for life;